Fasting and Mourning Again, Oh My

aim of fasts and mourning is spiritual rebirth, not preoccupation with sadness

Okay, I can buy that. Tomorrow is a no Torah study day. I was going to write about the desert and poppies but haven't finished it. I am not happy about having a day without the possibility of studying Torah. I don't study Torah every day, but I hate it when I'm told I'm not supposed to. I feel deprived. There are some terrifying aspects of Tisha B'Av, in my opinion.

Meanwhile, a kind person is giving me a ride to services tonight (none tomorrow, alas). I figure it's better to go mourn the destruction of the Temple than to sit home amidst the chaos of packing, mourning the destruction of my room. And besides, I love the tropes for Lamentations. It is genius. Torah is genius. Our sages are genius. G-d is good. I still don't want to fast. But I will be barefoot.

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Update: Yes, I was barefoot at the service. There were 14 of us (and one reluctant, pissed off teen- she was a sweetie for bearing it all). The rabbi said that it was okay if people wore leather; that the most important thing was that we take off our shoes (i.e., do not wear leather) during the service. Feh! I do not think so! I still assert, however, if anyone can get through Eichah (Lamentations) without shedding a tear...well.

I fasted and lasted 21 hours. Dear Rachel writes that she hoped it was meaningful. I dunno. I'm too distressed. This the first time this has happened. I hit the wall of major hunger at 2 pm and decided to continue. At hour 21 it was a piece of cake. So, I was readily tempted and I went for Tostitos and peach salsa. Sigh.